Wednesday, July 27, 2005

The Mother of Invention

The world is full of people who can't drive. Typically, those people include everyone in between you and your destination. So how can a person tell when the drivers around them can't drive? Paintball cannons. That's right, paintball cannons.

I think all cars should come equipped with a paintball cannon mounted on the hood or grill. A trigger would be placed on the steering wheel, and the driver would be allowed by law to fire the cannon at any driver who cut them off, changed lanes without signaling, or who drove more than 10 MPH below the speed limit. The worse someone drove, the more times they would be shot by paintballs. Thus, the really bad drivers could be determined by the amount of paintball splotches on their car, and they could be avoided.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

What color would you like on your car?

Anonymous said...

I was thinking big neon signs that say "Hey you are going 50 in the fast lane; Move over!" But I figure if they suck that bad at driving, they probably don't have enough sense to realize I mean them. Maybe we should have laser tag style sensors on the car that would change colors the more times your car got hit. Red means stay the hell away from that car. :-)

Anonymous said...

What about bringing a little Nascar into the mix? A little bump or a little rub might get their attention. Personally, I hate people who talk and drive at the same time. I believe that is the reason for much of the idiots that have no clue as to what is going on or even how fast they are driving.

Anonymous said...

No offense to you blondes out there... but this is funny.

A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he decides to buy her a cell phone. She is all excited, she loves her phone and he explains all the features on the phone.

The next day, the blonde goes shopping. Her phone rings and it's her husband:

"Hi honey", he says "how do you like your new phone?"

And she replies:

"I just love it, it's so small and your voice is clear as a bell but there's one thing I don't understand though".

"What's that, baby?," asks the husband.

"How did you know I was at Wal Mart?"